larry king divorces for the 8th time.

You know, if the first SEVEN f*cking marriages don’t work out I’d accept that the fact there there was something about MYSELF that needed some tweaking…

Not Larry King who filed for DIVORCE from his daughter wife, Shawn Southwick yesterday, citing “irreconcilable differences.”

Via the Associated Press,

Larry King filed for divorce on Wednesday shortly before his seventh wife also sought to end the couple’s nearly 13-year-old marriage (ed. note: he divorced his 3rd wife Alene Akins twice). The 76-year-old host of CNN’s “Larry King Live” filed hours before Shawn King filed her own petition. Both cited “irreconcilable differences.”

The couple were married in a hospital room in 1997 three days before Larry King underwent surgery to clear a clogged blood vessel. They have two sons, ages 11 and 9. The petitions differ in that Larry King is seeking joint custody, while his 50-year-old wife wants physical custody.

Larry King is also asking a judge not to award his wife any spousal support and to invalidate an agreement in which he transferred property to her, court records show. Shawn King’s petition seeks spousal support from her husband, along with ownership of the couple’s home in Beverly Hills, Calif., and two properties in Utah.”

Wouldn’t it be awesome if there was actually a BOX that you could check off for the ACTUAL reason for the separation?

Like for Larry: B*tch wouldn’t rub me down with Bengay.

Tiger Woods: B*tch wouldn’t let me f*ck bar hostesses in peace.

Charlie Sheen: B*tch couldn’t take a simple f*cking death threat.

Jesse James: B*tch wasn’t into banging Nazis.

It would pretty much take the GUESSWORK out of everything no?

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