Archive for April 22nd, 2010

22
Apr
10

holla.at.me.

Yeah.

You think Chris BeatHerDown’s  had enough of women yelling at him.

Ha. Get it? Holla?

*eye roll*

22
Apr
10

stuff that’s releveant but that i can’t be bothered to post.

Katy Perry shows off her work at the gym:

http://www.hollywoodtuna.com/

Tori Spelling already looks stupid, she does NOT need to open her mouth:

http://www.bettyconfidential.com/ar/ld/a/Tori-Spelling-Lands-Daytime-Talk-Show.html

Michelle “Bombshell” is begging to get her tattooed ass kicked:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/04/22/michelle-bombshell-mcgee_n_548358.html

Kristin Stewart is WANTED more than Angelina Jolie:

http://socialitelife.celebuzz.com/archive/2010/04/22/kristen_stewart_to_replace_angelina_jolie.php

Audrina Patridge got naked once. Still has ceiling eyes:

http://cityrag.com/2010/04/audrina-patridge-naked-and-exposed/

George Clooney might have found the bar hostess of his dreams:

http://www.dlisted.com/node/36970

 

22
Apr
10

must be drunk to apply.

Kate Gosselin is looking to bone someone. All that being dragged around like a cardboart cutout on Dancing With The “Stars” must have turned all the SUITORS away….

Via Life&Style,

According to Stephanie Santoro — the family’s former nanny, who hooked up with Jon after his June 2009 split with Kate — Jon and Kate hadn’t gotten physical since the very beginning of 2009. And she knows because Jon himself told her. “The last time Jon and Kate were intimate was January 2009,” Stephanie tells Life & Style.

and Popeater,

“Kate is serious about going Hollywood and thinks dating a celebrity is a great idea,” Kate’s pal tells me. “When Kate sees how Tom Cruise changed Katie Holmes life, it became clear that she needed to do the same. Obviously, she knows she’s not yet ready to date a George Clooney, but she thinks she would be the perfect partner for a Jeff Goldblum or someone like David Hasselhoff.”

Thatta girl Kate. Glad you’re trying to shake off that lying, cheating slob of an ex for….a drunkard.

Ah well, at least when the kids start getting on your nerves you’ll always have the comfort of knowing that there’s a bottle of rum within arm’s reach.

22
Apr
10

status update: like, totally single.

Sooo….you know how everyone thought that it was OBVIOUSLY Paris who used her big foot to kick boyfriend, Doug Reinhardt to the curb?

Well, no.

Via RadarOnline,

Sources close to the former couple tell RadarOnline.com that Reinhardt couldn’t handle the hotel heiresses’ meddling ways. According to our insider, “Paris was constantly checking Doug’s cell phone, and monitoring who he was talking to. Doug never gave her any reason to make her question him, she is just extremely insecure.”

Really? Someone with an in – home tanning machine, caked on makeup and countless wardrobe changes is insecure?

Don’t believe it.

Neither does Paris,

Via US magazine,

 “I am like so past that — I don’t even care!” 

“I don’t even remember that time in my life, I am over it! “I just realized that I’m better off without him. So I ended it because I deserve something much better! He wasn’t right for me and I will eventually find somebody who loves me for who I am. I am having so much fun. A lot of guys have obviously hit on me and I am getting thousands of calls, but I’m not ready to be with anyone.”

Kind of reminds me of one of those Facebook status updates of scorned b*tches.

“Going to the club, gonna get crunkkked tonight. Watch out boys, I’m wearing a miniskirt.”

or

“So busy, so many people to do, so many places to go. I have to like, delete my friends list, OMG, WTF, soooo many Friend Requests!”

When really, the only thing they’re getting into that night is a pair of flannel pyjamas and a pint of Ben & Jerry’s.

Anyways, this can only be a GOOD thing for Paris. She has to learn to keep her underwear on for a day. Then, maybe at  least there’ll be no confusion when Tinkerbell falls sick at the vet.

We all know how she loves to help rescue the animals.

 

 

22
Apr
10

abc doesn’t like boobs.

How rude.

Fat girls Plus Size women need to wear sexy bras too. I mean, at least they save money on breast IMPLANTS, sure they spend it on food instead, but it’s still economical.

Apparently ABC didn’t want to show this Lane Bryant ad during Dancing With The Stars because it was too sexy.

How scandalous.

Pamela Anderson’s watermelons have nothing on these girls right? And Niecy Nash and her wiggling and jiggling her t*tties on my HD TV screen every evening  just doesn’t compare to the OBSCENE amount of cleavage on these women.

For Chrissake.

Via the New York Post,

“ABC felt “the cleavage of the plus-size models, they said, was excessive, and we don’t think that’s the case.”

ABC is claiming they do indeed embrace the curves of volumptous women and that Lane Bryant is pulling a Pinocchio.

“Their statements are not true. The ad was accepted. Lane Bryant was treated absolutely no differently than any advertiser for the same product. We were willing to accommodate them, but they chose to seek publicity instead.”

Ok, ok, just show the damn commercial. If they were going to BAN something they should have blacked out Kate Gosselin’s face while she was on the freaking show.

No, better yet, she should have just been like a big blur just dancing clomping around.

No one complains. Everyone stays happy.

 

 

 

22
Apr
10

baby got back.

I guess with all the FOCUS on Kim’s ass, Kourtney really need to UP the ante’ for her press time…

You know, because she doesn’t really do anything. I mean, props to her for not coming out with a tape of her getting nailed into a mattress, but you’re a Kardashian, post a video of yourself giving birth or something.

Oh right, you already did that.

Anyways, LOVES her, and here’s how she feels on HER ass,

“I want to try to do squats — stuff that will keep the booty up there!” “I’m big on running — just putting on my iPod Shuffle and going for a run by my house. You’ll be having fun and losing weight at the same time.” I used to always get a chai latte from Starbucks, but I just switched to one espresso shot. I’m allowing myself one serving of caffeine while breastfeeding baby Mason, and the latte was really all sugar and milk.”

It’s NEVER TMI with a KK

Check out the pics of her out and about with baby Mason yesterday…

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

 

22
Apr
10

picture of the day.

Stephanie Pratt wants you to know that she doesn’t do METH anymore, and that she’d rather help save the bunnies. Naked.

Whatever, I’m just glad they didn’t use Heidi, that poor RABBIT would have been squeezed to death by asphyxiation.

 

22
Apr
10

just a palate cleanser.

Here’s J Woww and Angelina frolicking in the waters of one of the beaches in Miami

Except they aren’t really FROLICKING, more like HAWKING, only because “frolicking” is too classy a word to use when speaking of The Jersey Shore, and also because they’d have no idea what the f*ck it meant in the first place.

I just have a few questions though…

1. Why isn’t Angelina wearing the bathing suit she fashioned out of Glad garbage bags?

2. Did the lifeguard get to take the day off because J Woww and her breasts were there to replace any flotation devices which would have been used in case of an unfortunate accident?

3. So is Angelina a pro at Beer Pong then?

4. Why does it smell like Calzone??

These are VALID questions and its only fair if I get a VALID answer.

(Click through the slideshow, only if you can ignore those cravings for Calzone.)

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

 

22
Apr
10

i classy.

Just when I thought that this Oompa Loompa Loopity Do had enough common courtesy to respect that FACT that no one wants to see what’s under that sarong, she f*cks it all up by seductively licking what (let’s hope) is whipping cream out of a cup.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Ah well, just leave her be. It’s only a matter of time till someone brings out the harpoon.

22
Apr
10

BECAUSE ITS A THURSDAY…

AND because its April. AND because its the 22nd. AND because life just wouldn’t make sense to us if this didn’t happen at least 6 out of the 7 days in a week…

Via TMZ,

Lindsay Lohan is 0 for 2 in the deposition department. TMZ has learned Lindsay was a no-show again … in what is looking like a futile attempt to find out what really happened during her 2007 wild ride.

Three passengers in Lindsay’s car — along with the passenger in the car she was chasing — are suing her, claiming she endangered their lives in a drunken chase down Pacific Coast Highway.

The passengers were scheduled to take Lindsay’s depo yesterday at 10 AM but her lawyer, Ed McPherson, tells TMZ she couldn’t get a ride until 11 AM — she’s not allowed to drive as a condition of her probation.”

You know, this reminds me of a certain boyfriend who was charged with DUI which prevented him from driving to Canada to come see me ,by acting like a drunk f*ck driving down the PCH, so it’s a givein that I’m quite emotional about drunk f*cks driving down the Pacific Coast Highway.

So, f*ck you Lindsay Lohan.

 In case you already haven’t passed out cold while in traffic today, I hope you do. To make me feel even better, I hope it happens in front of the paparazzi so I can get a clear picture.

And f*ck you for stirring up hostile memories too.

B*tch.

 

 

 




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