03
May
10

well golly, I thought there were gonna be corndogs…

Here’s another case of when “door attendants need to be dragged into the street and shot.”

This case involves Jessica Simpson being somehow invited to the White House Correspondents’ Assoc. Dinner over the weekend.

I have a feeling she stumbled across the invitation and maybe thought it was for a Corndog eating contest or something, because otherwise it just DOESN’T make sense to me.

Anyways, Justin Bieber and Kim Kardashian were there too, so I’m guessing half the guestlist was probably the President’s attempt to welcome people of all walks of LIFE, and IQ standings, his ratings are already down, and nothing gets good press like Justin Bieber trying to feel up Kim K’s booty pads.

Anyways, what really provides for a good guffaw is the following interview:

Jessica Simpson to PEOPLE Magazine, on wanting to be Michelle Obama:

“I really do,” Simpson told PEOPLE before the White House Correspondents’ dinner in Washington, D.C., Saturday. “She’s such an incredible woman, and she’s with such a powerful man.”
What does Simpson admire most about the First Lady? “Everything she does she exudes confidence,” says the singer.

What the f*ck?

Michelle Obama’s goals are focused around supporting her husband and instilling political confidence in the American people, while Jessica’s goals are probably focused on trying not to fart everytime she’s faced with some sort of human interaction.

Yes, the role of First Lady is just made for her.

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Too bad Michelle was too classy to use Jessica as a spokesmodel for her efforts in curbing childhood obesity.

The President: “Hey wouldn’t it be funny if we used that fat girl, Simpleton, whatever her name is, to tell the Americans to cut back on Value Meals?”

Michelle: “Shame on you Barack, shame on you. She’s a lovely young woman.” Besides, I’ve already arranged to have our photographers take full, profile, ass and panoramic shots of Gabourey Sidibe. Especially when she hits the buffet table.

The President: “Baa Haa Haa Ha, oh the chubby ones always make me laugh.”

 

 

 

 


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