lindsay didn’t drink on the plane ride back…

Wow I was gone for like 3 days, and I come back to find that Lindsay has still managed to somehow stay alive and sober.

Mental note to self: Must stay away longer.

Anyways besides acting a fool and trying to chain smoke in the airplane bathroom on the way back from Cannes (damn smoke alarms) here’s what she got into…

Via the LA Times,

A Beverly Hills judge who took Lindsay Lohan to task for being at the Cannes Film Festival rather than appear at a mandatory court hearing has decided to take a day out of her vacation to take up the actress’ case on Monday … Another judge was supposed to handle Lohan’s case on Monday because [Judge] Revel was scheduled to begin a vacation … Court spokesman Allan Parachini said the judge would be taking time out of her vacation to conduct Monday’s hearing.

And then when she finally made it to court the next day, after running out of “the dog ate my driver” excuses instead of being banished to makeout with Tila Tequila, THIS happened:

Via RadarOnline,

In Judge Marsha Revel’s chambers Monday, Lindsay Lohan and her lawyer were unable to provide a plane ticket proving she had a trip home for a mandatory court date, RadarOnline has learned exclusively. The meeting took place after Lindsay and her lawyer Shawn Chapman Holley represented in court that the could produce proof that Lindsay had a plane ticket for May 19, the day before she was required to appear in Los Angeles court for a probation status update hearing.

But Deputy District Attorney Danette Meyers told RadarOnline.com exclusively that Lohan did NOT produce a plane ticket she claimed to have when the parties met after Monday’s court proceeding.

“All I got was an itinerary for travel on May 18th, and not a plane ticket,” Meyers told RadarOnline.com exclusively. ”I did get a copy of Ms. Lohan’s plane ticket and boarding pass for May 22nd. “I will definitely be bringing this up at the probation violation hearing.”

You know what who the f*ck cares about documents and hearings and sh*t when you can barely feel your face.

Yeahhhhhh b*tches. Jokessss on youuuu. Now someone grab me a tissue I think I just drooled.


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