Posts Tagged ‘Shauna Sand

04
Jun
10

huh? what? who? why?

Uuuummm. Shauna Sand is going to be on the next season of Celebrity Rehab.

I don’t think I’ve seen this chick on anything other than a porn, but…okay.

Via TMZ,

“Shauna Sand’s penchant for booze and attention has finally paid off — TMZ has learned the former Playboy Playmate has signed on for the next season of “Celebrity Rehab.”

We’re told Shauna will check into Dr. Drew’s famous recovery center in Pasadena [today].

As we previously reported, the show has already lined up several other minor celebs including Tila Tequila and Jason Wahler.”

Minor celebs? Is that what they’re calling addicts and hookers these days?

Nice. So all I have to do to get my mug on TV is have sex with a midget, while on E.

Hollywood here I come!

Oh and for Shauna’s kids…? They’re just happy they don’t have to explain to their teacher why they’re wearing G strings under their pants. It’s full on coverage while Mom’s gone!

Yay!

 

 

23
Jan
10

Hooters for Haiti.

She brought new meaning to “Bite the hand that feeds you,” BUT the Lucite Princess that is has since Shauna Sand EMBRACED, or wrapped her LEGS around the fact that her sex tape will be displayed prominently in every back room of the stores who sell shoes for the WORKING lady.

Heidi Montag’s MUSE decided to leave the kids at home (they were planning on arranging a STING operation to get Child Services to notice them once and for all) to PROMOTE her DVD debut at Rick’s Cabaret in NYC.

This bi*ch also claimed that she would be taking it off in order to RAISE money (along with other things) for Haiti.

I know that the residents, and the families of those who have lost loved ones in Haiti appreciate each and every donation, whether it comes out of your carefully doctored coochie or not.

23
Jan
10

Treat Her Like A Lady.

It might be raining in El Lay, but that doesn’t mean that the nightly hooking should come to a halt anytime soon…

Shauna Sand dug through the piles of self titled porn, lucite sex toys, and discarded stripper stage garments, in order to show off her Sunday best…

I mean, the young are impressionable, they MUST be shown the morals and dignity of a woman at a young age.

That little girl is just desperately awaiting Brangelina to swoop down and take her away. Or Kate Gosselin.

Sh*t.

She’ll take Octomom instead of being paraded around Hollywood while her “mom” is auditioning for whoever’ll include her in the next XXX release.

06
Dec
09

Picture of the Day.

Shauna Sand’s daughter passed out from asphyxiation by her mom’s cleavage, after leaning in for a peck on the forehead.

24
Nov
09

Slap me with a pair of lucite heels!

Apparently, the Queen of Skank, Shauna Sand is claiming that she had a one year affair with Gossip Girl stud Chace Crawford in 2003.

“He was so incredibly beautiful — I immediately fell in love with him!”

Chace’s friends also confirm the secret affair that took place while he was 18 and she was the cougariffic age of 32.

I can picture family TV night on a Monday at the Sand household.

“Gee Mom that Nate Archibald is oh so cute. I’d love for him to give me a hug. Eeek!”

“Oh I’m sure I can arrange for him to come over a give us more than a hug sweetie.”

Insert perverted wink and smirk here_________.

 




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